Monday, December 20, 2010

The Holidays Are HARD

This is my first holiday single in 5 years and let me tell you it is HARD! Everywhere you turn there are families, ads about what to buy for your husband/wife and lifetime Christmas movies, lol. On top of that it's my favorite holiday and it is definitely hard to be spending this year alone. Not to say that my friends and family aren't great, because they certainly are. And I won't be alone I'll be surrounded by my family and I'm sure come Friday when I'm with family I'll be fine, but right now it is tough. I want nothing more than to be married and have a family of my own and I know it'll happen for me when it's meant to.

That said I've got a lot to be grateful for. I've got family and friends that love and support me. I've got my dogs, which I thank god for. Going through a time in my life such as this it helps more than I can ever express to have the unconditional love that I get from them. It may sound silly to someone without pets, but having them has definitely helped me get through some of the tough moments over the past six months. I have a roof over my head, food in my fridge and clothes on my back.

I just need to remind myself to appreciate all of the things I have in my life. I am a good person, with a good heart and in time I will get all of the things I deserve. Enough talk of this, I just needed to get my feelings out there. I hope you all have a wonderful holiday and appreciate all of the blessings you have in your life.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Weigh In and Update

I'm sorry my posts have been so sporadic over the past months. To be honest I've been lacking motivation to really got down to business and get serious again. And because of that I've felt like I didn't have much to post on a healthy living blog short of spitting out a bunch of malarkey to you all. That said I have started to make some changes, so I can start moving the scale in the right direction again.

First things first, I weighed in this morning. I weigh 178.0 lbs. I'm up since my last weigh in, but I've been at this weight for a while now. Since I am finally making some changes, hopefully we'll see a loss next week.

Regarding some of the changes I'm making one of the big changes is with my diet. I've decided to take a page from Elle, a prior fat girl's book. She focuses on eating healthfully, getting lots of fruits and vegetables and lean protein, and doesn't count calories. I think it's important that I do it this way this time around, because 1. eating lots of fruits and vegetables is good for your health and 2. this is a life change I've been working on and that's the way I should be eating for the rest of my life. I went grocery shopping recently and bought tons of fruits and veggies and have already been hitting them up rather than the crap food I was eating. I also made a batch of "healthy" cookies. Now don't get me wrong, I realize that eating cookies isn't a great thing when you're trying to lose weight, but I have a major sweet tooth and I feel if I don't give myself a little something to look forward to at the end of the night then that's when I'll end up wanting to cheat. Plus making them myself I know they're much better for me than if I bought some processed crap at the store to satisfy my sweet craving.

Another thing is of course exercise. Since I've had back problems I have been seeing a physical therapist and yesterday he kicked my butt! I'm finally pain free, a little tight sometimes, but most of the time pain free, he really started to push me to help me see what exercises I could do to start to strengthen my back and my core so I don't have any back problems in the future. This morning I can definitely feel it. I don't know what exercise it was from, but on my sides underneath my armpits I am totally sore! It feels good to finally be sore from exercise again! Also, he mentioned a couple times how strong I was when he had me doing different exercises and that felt really good and just reminded me how good I feel when I'm working on being fit and strong. I'm still working on the gym thing. I've visited and spoke to people at 3 different gyms and none of them fit the bill. The price was right at the first one, but they didn't really offer any classes. The second one was way to expensive and they had really old equipment and decor (think 70's teal carpet and bad wallpaper) and mostly focused on the classes they offered. The third price was ok, but they also didn't offer any classes. So, finally I think I'm going to settle on a Bally's that's a few miles from my place. I haven't visited it yet, but the price is right and they offer a number of classes. Since it's a "chain" fitness center I'm sure it will have newer equipment and decent amenities, so if all goes well I will be joining this gym this weekend.

Now onto the personal side of things. I mentioned a date I had a couple weeks ago. Going into the date I was nervous, but really looking forward to it. We decided to meet at the museum where he had a membership to get coffee and walk around a bit. While I was parking my car he called to let me know he had just gotten there and that was the first time we had actually spoke. Holy Batman did he have an accent! I thought he was hispanic and he lived in Dallas, so I was expecting possibly a Texas accent. Well it turns out he lived in Peru until he was 26! I park my car and walk in and I see him...and I'm a little disappointed. He's not a bad looking guy and I know it was a coffee date, but he was wearing old jeans an old t-shirt and old tennis shoes. I don't expect my date to go all out and dress to the nines, by any means, but I mean come on it's a first date and we're meeting at a museum. You could at least put on some nice jeans, a sweater and some half way decent shoes. Lol, god I'm sounding picky now. Anyway, that aside I thought he was cute and then he smiled and he had yellow teeth. Haha I'm sounding ridiculous. We went to get coffee and sat down and started chatting and the conversation was really easy, but there just wasn't any spark. We walked around and checked out the museum (I had never been) and it was comfortable, but I found myself keeping my hands in my pockets in case he would try to grab my hand or something...not a good sign obviously. Needless to say there was no second date. I think he could be a good friend, but nothing more so back to the drawing board!

Tonight I have some plans with a new friend. We met through a mutual friend a few weeks ago and really hit it off. We haven't gotten together since then, but she has a work Christmas party tonight (relatively casual at a mexican restaurant, so I think it will be low key) and I'm going to be her date. We're meeting up for a drink beforehand and then we'll head over to the party afterward. It should be a good time. She and I had a great time the last time we hung out dancing the night away, so I'm sure it'll be a blast. Plus it's another opportunity to meet new people and that's always a good thing.

Anyway, I better get to work. Have a great weekend everyone!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

One Year Anniversary

This post is a day late, but it's my one year anniversary! Unfortunately my weight is the same as it was last time I weighed in, but I'm still proud. I'm proud that I've lost a decent amount of weight and I've kept it off. I'm much more aware of my choices and I make a conscious effort to make healthier choices. Obviously I still need to get that focus back so I can finish this journey that I'm on, but in the mean time I'm just happy to be this much better off than I was a year ago.

That said, I've got some other interesting news. I'm on a dating website called Match and I'm meeting up with someone for coffee this weekend. I am extremely nervous. Even though I lost a decent amount of weight I'm still not where I'd like to be and I still have that mindset where I worry if he'll think that I'm too fat. I know that's an awful way to think, but I just can't help it! The main reason I'm so nervous is because he seems like a great catch. He's the kind of guy you only hope would be interested in you. At least that's what comes across for me from his profile and the couple emails we've exchanged. He's tall, dark and handsome as they say. He's got a great smile, dimples (gotta love that)...and he's a doctor. Seriously?? Anyway, I'm sure you can see why I'm nervous.

On another note I had a great Thanksgiving. I got to see family I haven't seen in quite some time. It was just good to catch up with everyone. Living out of state I missed a lot of family functions, so it was nice to be a part of it again. I'm looking forward to my first Christmas back in WI. While I type it's lightly snowing outside. My dogs are whining, so I guess I better go take them outside. Have a great week!

Monday, November 22, 2010

Belated Weigh In

I didn't post on Friday, but I did weigh in. I stayed the same. Big shocker. With my back problems I've definitely let everything go down hill. Honestly, I'm lucky I haven't gained weight! I've been eating crappy food for a while now and I can definitely feel it. I really need to re-focus myself and get a handle on my eating and exercising.

I did go to the gym I was thinking about joining. I'm on the fence. I absolutely love zumba, so I wanted a gym that offered a zumba class. According to zumba's website this gym does. Then on the gym's website it said they offered Pilates as well. Those are the 2 classes I really wanted to have available to me and then of course cardio and weight equipment. The gym was nice and clean and everything, but they do not offer either of these classes right now. Also, the area where they do the classes that they do offer is not an actual room, but just a corner of the gym where people using equipment could just be staring at you. And when there isn't a class going on this is the stretching area of the gym. My dilemma, I guess, is if I just suck it up and just do cardio, weight training and stretching on my own since they do have good equipment and the price is definitely right. I think I'll just have to do a little research to see if there are any other zumba or pilates classes in my area and see what makes the most sense.

In the meantime I think I'll just utilize my bike and cycle every day to start burning some more calories, so hopefully I can see a loss before my 1 year anniversary which is just 8 days away.

Does anyone have any breakfast/lunch/dinner ideas that they'd like to share? I want to switch to eating more whole foods and would love to get some meal ideas so that hopefully I will feel like I have more choices at my meals and be able to stick with a more "whole" meal plan. I love fruits and veggies, so there's no issue with me being a picky eater or anything. I'd love to hear what you have to say!

Tuesday, November 16, 2010


My back is, unfortunately, as bad as ever. I've been going to the chiropractor for about a week and a half now and haven't really seen any improvement yet. In fact, it seems to be even worse at times. I had an appointment yesterday and since it had gotten quite a bit worse over the weekend, she did ultrasound therapy in addition to what she typical does. I'm not sure what the other thing she does is called, but she puts these little pads on my back that are hooked up to a machine that runs little electrical currents through my muscles to break up the muscle spasm. The ultrasound is supposed to emit a deep heat (although it only feels slightly warm on your skin) to break up the muscle spasm.

They also do massage at this office, so today I will be getting a half hour massage and then have another treatment with the chiropractor. My back is just messed up and it definitely makes me not want to work out in any way, although, I know I should because the more I move the better it feels. It's stiff and uncomfortable at first, but it usually does feel a bit better after I exercise. I'm just not sure what I should or shouldn't be doing in terms of making my back better and not worse. Before I go in for the massage and chiropractor appointments I also have a doctor's appointment. Since moving to Milwaukee I have yet to see a doctor, so I decided I should get a primary care physician on board with my back issues as well (plus I just need to establish care with a doctor anyway, so I can handle any other issues that may come up). I found a nearby doctor and am going to see them this afternoon, just before my massage and chiropractic appointments. Hopefully I'll start to have some breakthroughs soon, because this sucks.

I still need to go to the gym and sign up for a membership, but since I moved to WI payroll had to mail me a paper check this pay period and I'm waiting on that and then I'll go check out the gym and hopefully sign myself up. I'm afraid to see what all these doctor bills are going to cost me. My insurance isn't great, but the fact is I've got to figure out what's going on with my back because life like this just isn't working for me.

Aside from all of that I had a great weekend. I went to Appleton to celebrate my sister-in-law's birthday with her. It was a great time. This first pic is of me and my aunt Jen who has actually become quite good friends with my sister-in-law, Kristin. She's the youngest of all of my mom's siblings.

Then this picture is all of us girls, minus one, that went out that night. My sister-in-law, Kristin, is the one who's second to the left next to me. Then next to her is my aunt Jen again and Kristin's friend Laura. It was definitely a fun night. Nothing too crazy, just a nice night out.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Weigh In

I weighed in this morning at 177.2 lbs. So I'm still up a pound from my last weigh in. I found a gym near my new place that's just $20 a month and looks really nice from the pictures I saw online, so I'm planning to go check it out next week and hopefully get a membership. It'll be good to both get me healthy and help me meet people, since I still don't know a ton of people that live here in Milwaukee. They offer Zumba and I'm interested in seeing what other classes they offer. Their website also says they offer cardio kickboxing, yoga, spinning and martial arts; but it doesn't offer a full list of their classes online, even so that's a decent list in itself. I'm hoping they have Pilates to help my with my week core/back and improve on my back pain problem.

Tonight I'm driving up to my hometown with the dogs to stay at my mom's and hang with her and my little brother. It should be a good time. :-) Then tomorrow night I'm taking the dogs to the doggy daycare/boarding facility and going out with my brother and sister-in-law to celebrate her 28th birthday. I'm really looking forward to just going out and having a good time! It should be a good weekend.

Have a great weekend!

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

I need advice!

I know I already posted once today (I'm MIA and then twice in one day...go figure), but I need to get your opinions. I've been suffering with some bad back pain lately. I wake up in the morning and hobble around like a little old lady until my back muscles stretch out a bit, then it still hurts but at least I can walk where most people wouldn't notice the issue. When I'm sitting at my computer working pain shoots down my legs, not all day long, but enough to be frustrating. When I stand up after sitting for a while I again deal with a little bit of the old lady syndrome until my muscles stretch out. It's not debilitating, but it is majorly uncomfortable, although I do have a pretty high pain tolerance.

About a week ago I decided to try out going to a chiropractor. She told me that I do have a pretty significant muscle spasm in my back, mainly my lower back but she did say it goes into my upper back as well. So far I have been 3 times and while I love the sessions I can't help but wonder if it's really going to fix my problems. Should I go to the doctor and get a referral to see a physical therapist instead? Or perhaps I should just set up my own workout routine including things like pilates and yoga to help with the muscle issues? I've enjoyed my visits to the chiropractor's office, but honestly it's fairly expensive and I haven't noticed much of a difference yet except for the temporary relief directly following the appointment. I realize it's only been a week and I may just need to be patient. She said it could take up to a month to notice any significant difference. I'm just trying to decide if this is the right route for me? Or if there's anything specific I should be doing in addition to going to the chiropractor. I'd love for this to get better so I no longer need to go to the chiropractor, I'd rather it not be a weekly thing for the rest of my life, lol. Any advice would greatly appreciated, since I'd love to not be in pain all day every day.

Hey There!

I know I've been really bad about posting over the past few months. I've definitely let life get the best of me. Between moving, trying to get settled into a new city and a friend coming to visit for a week I've been busy and really haven't been focused at all. I want to re-focus myself and get my butt back in gear, so I can reach my goals.

My one year anniversary from when I started this blog is just 3 weeks from now! I know I haven't lost a ton of weight, but I'm still proud to be where I am compared with where I was a year ago. I weighed myself this morning and I am up a pound from my last weigh in, but considering I haven't been overly focused on weight loss (or even really maintenance for that matter) I'm proud that I've basically learned how to maintain. I've still got a ways to go, but in my adult life whenever I've lost weight before I've put it right back on once I stopped tracking. This time is definitely different for me.

To end my year with a bang I'm really going to push myself to exercise daily, take my dogs for walks, seek out some exercise classes (still looking for a zumba class in my area) and just try to make better food choices. We'll see what I can accomplish in these last 3 weeks. I'd love to get into the 160's, but that might be pushing it, so we'll see what happens.

I will do an official weigh in this Friday and get my butt back on track. :-)

Since I've been gone a while here are a few recent pictures. This first one is of my and my dog Dot. I decided to pick her up and of course the first thing she tries to do is lick my face.

This is a picture of the view of Lake Michigan (or as my friend said "that's not a lake, that's an ocean!" - she's from San Diego, lol) from the park that's less than half a mile from my house.

Here's a picture of my very first tattoo that I just got a week and a half ago! It's mostly healed now and I'm glad I got it. It signifies good luck in this new phase of my life where I'm single living in a new city.

Here's a picture of my great friend Tiffany (the one from San Diego) and I in Chicago. We took a day trip down there while she was here and had a great time.

Last but not least here's a picture of the really pretty necklace I bought for myself in Chicago. Who says you can't buy yourself a heart shaped necklace?

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Life is Precious

One of my great friends from CA flew in to visit me in Milwaukee. She got here last Tuesday and stayed until today. Right after she got here she got news from her mom that her grandfather had passed away in his sleep. She was working through the grief for that and then today she found out the guy she had been dating on and off for the past year died in a car accident last night. My heart absolutely breaks for her. I wish more than anything I could be there for her, but I had to put her on a plan to go back home today. It just reminds me of how precious life is...

Monday, October 4, 2010

Hey There!

I hope everyone had a great weekend. I know I did! Friday night was a nice relaxing night, nothing big going on, which is definitely nice sometimes. Then on Saturday night I had plans to go out for a nice dinner with my dad and step-mom who were in town visiting from CA. It ended up being a great dinner with lots of yummy seafood. Here's a picture of me while I was waiting for them to meet up with me for dinner.

Then on Sunday was the Packer game. We had a nice casual day hanging out. Here's a picture of my step-mom, dad, sister-in-law, brother and of course myself. :-)

Finally, here's a pic of my doggies. It's hard to get fun pictures of them, cause as soon as I pull out the camera they come to me to check out the camera and see what's going on. Lol.

That was my weekend! It's moving week, so I'm going to be crazy busy. I can't wait to get settled into my new place! I have a three day work week and then I'll be getting down to business. Wish me luck!

Friday, October 1, 2010

Weigh In!!

I weighed in this morning at 176.2 lbs. That's another pound I'm down! Slow and steady, but it's going down and that's the important thing. I'm only two tenths of a pound away from 30 lbs lost. Also, I've only got two months left till my year anniversary since I began this blog. I've definitely had my fair share of small gains and just stagnant progress, but for 10 months I've continued to slowly, but surely lose and that's huge!

Another huge milestone is that I've surpassed my low weight last time I tried to lose weight in 2008! My low weight then was 176.5 lbs and then I started to gain. I'm not far under that, but I'm under it and I'm proud. It took me significantly less time to lose the weight that go around, but this time it's going to stick. I'm not going to gain the weight back, rather I'm going to continue losing.

I want to set a new healthy goal for myself. By the end of the year I want to get down to at least 166.4 lbs. That puts me in the healthy BMI range with a BMI of 24.9. That's just 9.8 lbs that I'd need to lose in 13 weeks. That's more than doable. Hopefully, I can blow that out of the water. I'm going to start cycling again, in addition to the dog walking, once I get settled in my new place with my stationary bike. And I'm planning to focus on getting more fruits and vegetables into my diet. However, I've got to get through holiday season too, so it may be a cinch or with the holidays it may be just right. I don't plan to go crazy over the holidays, but I want to be realistic. Throughout this whole thing I wanted to make this something I can stick with and that's I think why I've lasted 10 months, but that's also why the weight's coming off slower than it could and I'm ok with that.

I'm definitely starting to notice a bigger difference in my energy levels. Sometimes, when I'm walking my dogs I'll decide to jog with them for a bit...and it's easy. I used to get horribly out of breath even thinking about jogging for a block and all of a sudden it's a piece of cake. Also, I've started doing jumping jacks sometimes when something's heating up in the microwave. The other day I did 100 jumping jacks! And again, it was pretty easy. I didn't really even break a sweat, which for me is unheard of. I've always referred to myself as a sweaty Betty, lol. I'm just much lighter on my feet and dancing or jogging or playing with kids or whatever is just so much easier than it ever was before and it feels great! I always thought I was just a lazy person and I was never going to be one to want to get up and move around unless I had to, but as more weight comes off the more I enjoy any kind of movement, whether it's playing with my dogs or dancing to my iPod.

I'm just excited to see where life takes me as I continue hitting these milestones and getting healthier and feeling more and more sure of myself. I'm moving into my new place next weekend and I can't wait! I'm looking forward to getting settled and working on starting up my life again and dating. I've got so much to offer I just need to be with someone who can offer in return what I need.

Anyway, this weekend my dad and step-mom are in town visiting from California, so I'm looking forward to a nice dinner out with them tomorrow night. They haven't seen me since I've lost these almost 30 pounds! Then I've got a 3 day week next week and the move begins! Have a great weekend!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Weigh In and Measurements

I weighed in this morning at 177.2 lbs. That's another 1.3 lbs gone! Gotta love it. I just figured out today what a "normal" BMI would be and when I get down to 167, then I'll be "normal". That's only 10 lbs away! I definitely can't wait for that.

Buying new clothes is definitely getting more fun. None of my pants fit anymore, so recently I had to go out and get a couple pairs of jeans. I ended up getting a pair a dark skinny jeans and a pair of dark boot cut jeans. Both were very cute! They're a size 14, so I've still got a ways to go to get to a smaller size, but brand new they fit like a glove and didn't give me a huge muffin top.

Here are a few pics of some of the new stuff I bought. This first one isn't a very clear pic, but it's the best I have for now. When I put this top on it made me look TINY!! Seriously, if they had it in 10 colors I would have bought all 10. I feel great in it. Paired with skinny jeans and a heel it's a great outfit I can't wait to wear. I'll get a better pic once I actually wear it out. In this pic I was just trying it on for fun. :-)

This was an outfit I wore out to sushi with some girlfriends. Once again, not the best pic (I need a tripod or something) but still I felt really cute in it.

I also took my measurements today. Here they are:

Neck: 13.0 (no change)
Bicep: 11.75 (-0.25)
Forearm: 9.5 (no change)
Chest: 39.75 (-1.25)
Waist: 34.5 (no change)
Hips: 41.75 (-0.75)
Thigh: 22.25 (-0.75)
Calf: 14.5 (no change)
Total: 187.0 (-3.0)

Oktoberfest on Saturday this weekend, can't wait. Have a great weekend!

Friday, September 17, 2010

Weigh In

I weighed in today at 178.5 lbs!! That's another 2.5 lbs gone. :-) Only 2.5 more lbs to go to reach my 30 lbs lost goal. Honestly, I still haven't been watching what I eat at all. I've continued the four walks a day with the dogs. Usually we walk at 8:30am, 1:00pm, 6:00pm and 10:00pm. Maybe the walks every few hours improves my metabolism? Whatever it is, it rocks. Although, I do want to focus on eating healthier, cause I know eating poorly just isn't good for my body.

I found an apartment in Milwaukee! Finally! I can't tell you how good it's going to feel once I'm settled into my new place. My brother and sister-in-law have been great and living here has been wonderful, but I'm just craving my independence. I tend to be a bit of a loner at times, so I'm looking forward to getting some alone time to just do what I want when I want. I can walk around naked and not worry about someone walking in on me. ;-) Anyway, I'm just really looking forward to it.

About the new place. It's in a part of town called Bayview and...JewliaGoulia is going to be my neighbor. How cool is that!! I emailed her once to ask her about biking trails in Milwaukee and found out she lived in the neighborhood I was looking to potentially move in to and now I am officially moving to that neighborhood. It's crazy to think how starting a blog can turn into you potentially turning "blog friends" into real everyday friends. Lol.

About the new apartment. It's the upstairs of a duplex. It has two bedrooms, one bath with a clawfoot bathtub, wood floors, walk in closets in both bedrooms, the kitchen is open to the living room, a fenced in yard, offstreet parking, laundry in the basement and rent includes heat which is key in Wisconsin. Basically, it rocks my socks off. The only things it didn't have was a dishwasher and AC...I think I'll live. It's fall so AC is no longer an issue and I'm only one person so dishes shouldn't be too bad. I just have to suck it up.

Anyway, that's what's going on in my world. I'll be moving in early October and then I'm really going to focus on improving my eating habits. Once I'm in my own place, and not eating out of someone else's fridge, there won't be any excuses. Plus there are a few "healthy" grocery stores in the area that I plan to check out to see if they have decent variety and if the prices aren't too high. No matter what though, I will be improving my eating habits for sure.

I seriously can't wait to move. I'm signing the lease tonight and then I'm going down to Indiana for the weekend to pack up the rest of my stuff, so that when moving day comes it'll go as smoothly as possible. I'm also going to pick up a few things to bring back with me to my brother's house: my food scale, some healthy cookbooks, my roomba (I hate vaccuuming!), my cloth tape measure so I can finally do measurements and my scale so I can get back to using the one I started with. Have a great weekend everyone!

Tuesday, September 7, 2010


I didn't even realize that at my last weigh-in I reached my next goal! I've officially lost 25 pounds! Things may be moving slowly, but they're still moving. I weighed in on Friday and my weight stayed the same this week. Friday night was my friend's birthday, so here are a few fun pics from the weekend.

I don't have a full body pic of my outfit the second night, but here's a pic I took of me in my smokin' hot shoes. :-)

And a head shot with my friend, Katie. :-)

And last but not least a pic of my dogs snoozing on their dog beds. Gotta love the pups!

I really need to find myself a Zumba class here in Appleton! I was on such a high after taking that class when I was living in Indy, so it'd definitely be good for my well-being to take one while I'm staying here. Although, I pulled a muscle in my lower back (the third time in 3 years...this can't be normal at my age), so I need to take it easy for a couple days till it's feeling better.

Anyway, I hope you all had a great weekend and here's to a great week!

Monday, August 30, 2010

Almost Three Weeks!!

Wow, so it's been almost 3 weeks since I posted last. My mind and life in general has been full of all the decisions I need to make in the near future. I had made up my mind to try and find a new home for the dogs and was really heartbroken about it. I went away with family for an extended weekend at my grandparents cottage in northern WI. It was the first time the dogs got to run and play in a lake and they absolutely loved it. Every time I saw how happy they were it just killed me thinking that I was planning to get rid of them after the weekend was over. But then I'd take them for a walk where they'd be yanking my arm off or waking up in the middle of the night and I'd remember the reason I felt I needed to find them a new home, because I was feeling overwhelmed.

When I got back from the weekend I spoke with my step-mom about the dogs. She knows how much I love animals and was just concerned I was making this decision too rashly. She didn't want me to do this and regret the decision 6 months down the road, so she offered to help me with the dogs by paying for boarding if I need it for part of the time I'm in between places to live. She also offered to pay for training to help me work on some of the training issues with the dogs. The fact that someone just offered help took a huge load off my shoulders. Part of me being overwhelmed was just feeling like I had so much on my shoulders and that offer of help took a load off without anything actually changing.

I haven't taken her up on her offer yet, but I did decide to take some steps to work on some of the things that were bothering me the most. I got prong collars for the dogs for walking them. Some of you may disagree with the use of these, but the second I put those collars on they were like new dogs! They immediately stopped pulling and stopped choking themselves and now we are all enjoying our walks together. I've been taking them for 3 or 4 walks a day, which has been great for all of us. One of the other issues was that they would wake me up in the middle of the night to go outside and I'd get up and take them out. I've known for some time that I shouldn't be doing that, so I finally decided enough is enough and I stopped getting up with them in the night. Literally, it took them like one day to adjust to the new schedule of sleeping through the night and waiting till the morning to go out. So now walks are enjoyable and I've been sleeping through the night for a couple weeks.

We've still got a few things to work through, but for the most part it's going well at this point in time. Once I'm living in Milwaukee, though, I'll have to see how they're fitting into my lifestyle down there. I want to be social and meet new people. The dogs can help that in the sense that having dogs just naturally causes people to approach you and talk to you. However, my dogs still jump all over people when they want to say hello and that's something I really want to put the kabosh on so that when I meet people or invite people to my place for the first time they aren't overwhelmed by the dogs. It's hard to handle this training issue with two young dogs. Controlling and training one dog would be much easier, but say one dog would have sat and behaved, if they see the other dog jumping...well you can guess what happens. It's just hard with two dogs and one owner to control that bad behavior the way I'd like. On the flip side, though, they'll be a hindrance to my social life. I can't leave them alone for too long or sometimes they get a little destructive, chewing on the corner of baseboards. I've started getting them big bones to chew on and kongs filled with peanut butter that I freeze when I know I'm going out for a few hours and that seems to have helped significantly. Hopefully with the bones and kongs and just time they'll completely get out of this bad behavior.

If I ever want to spend the night somewhere else, though, I'll always have to plan ahead and board them or bring them with or I just won't be able to do it. I can't just be willy nilly and do as I please when I please. I just have to decide if all the great things that come along with having them make up for the fact that I'm tied down a bit with the responsibility of caring for them. Things are going in the right direction in terms of me figuring out the issues, but only time will tell if everything will work out with me keeping the dogs but it looks promising.

Regarding weight loss I have not been tracking my food at all. It's hard when you're living in someone else's house, because you want to cause as little waves as possible so I've kind of been just going with the flow. They do try to eat healthy as well, but they do tend to eat out more than I would be at this point. So I've had pizza and burgers way more than I have in recent months.

That said, I've been walking the dogs tons so that still resulted in a 4 lb weight loss this past week! Two weigh-ins ago (I just added my last two weigh ins on here) it came in as a gain, but I think that was just the new scale and not an actual gain. Once I get my scale back I'll probably show a decent loss since my sister-in-law said the scale here matches her doctor's scale and I know mine is probably a few pounds lower. Regardless, though, I lost 4 lbs this past week which is great. Even though I haven't been eating as healthy as I could be I have been watching my portions. I used to eat until I'd feel like I was going to explode and all of a sudden I seem to have self control...what a concept.

Anyway, I look forward to seeing what my weigh in will be this Friday morning and if I have another decent loss. My friend's 30th birthday is this Friday, so I'll be driving down to Milwaukee to spend the weekend at her place and then I'll be driving back up on Sunday, possibly, to my sister-in-laws parents cabin in northern WI (weather permitting) to spend Labor Day with her family on the lake. For my friend's birthday Saturday night we're getting all gussied up for a night out on the town and I have a killer outfit. I'll definitely post a picture or two from the night once I get back. I might even check out some apartments in Milwaukee, so it's going to be a busy weekend for me.

Anyway, that's all for now. Sorry for the book, but it's been a while since I posted and I had to catch you up on the goings on in my life. I hope all is well for all of you!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

What Would You Do?

If you were me, what would you do? I love my dogs with all my heart and even thinking about this brings me tears, but I'm feeling overwhelmed with them at this point in my life. I got them when I felt I was settling down and had the help of another person. Now all of a sudden I'm back in the single world trying to care for 2 one year old extremely energetic dogs on my own and I just don't know if they fit into my new lifestyle. The last thing I want to do is find them a new home, but I can't help but feel like it's just too much no matter how much I'd wish otherwise. And a part of me feels like they might be happier with someone who's more settled than I am at this point. So what would you do?

And The Good News Just Keeps Coming...

I can't really go into details, but I found out something yesterday that added a whole new layer to everything I've got going on right now. It's just one more thing for me to be worried about. Please can life get easier sometime soon...cause I sure could use a break. I deserve it damn it! This song describes how I'm feeling right now.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Life is Crazy!!

Sorry I've been gone for so long! Life has been extremely crazy as of late. I was living in the house and just not happy being there. I felt really alone and needed to get away. My brother and sister-in-law suggested I move in with them in Appleton, WI while I figure out my next step and so that's what I did. I moved in this past Saturday and so far things are going well. The living situation is actually really good. They have a finished basement that already had a TV and couches. Then they had a pool table down here, but they moved it out of the way and moved the guest bed down here so I essentially have my own studio apartment. We set up my computer on a card table, so I can still work. And there's even a full bath down here. Oh there's also an empty unfinished bedroom down here, which has worked out great because if I want to go somewhere and I don't want to worry about my puppies messing with any of their stuff I can just put them in that room with some toys and I don't have to worry as much.

The hard part about living here so far is that they don't have a fenced in yard. The puppies are used to going outside and running around and playing and going to the bathroom whenever they want. Now I'm just walking them a few times a day and I'm hoping they'll get used to that routine soon. They've had a couple accidents (which they never did at the house anymore) and it's stressing out my brother and sister-in-law, so I really hope they adjust soon and stop with the accidents. Mostly it's been at night when I'm sleeping. I'll take them out before I go to bed, they'll usually wake me up once at some point in the night and I'll take them out again and then I'll get up in the morning and find an accident. I really hope it stops soon, because I don't know what more I can do to prevent it and I really don't want to have to think about what I'd need to do if they don't stop and they don't want the dogs here anymore.

Then there are the walks. They haven't been walked regularly for some time before moving in here. When you have a yard it just gets so easy to let them run around in the yard and not walk them. I started out walking them separately. At first it was awful and then they both started to improve. It's really a pain to walk them separately. I'd rather walk them together and take them for a longer walk rather than two shorter walks, so last night I took them for their first walk together. It's quite ridiculous looking I'm sure. They pull the ENTIRE time. They're choking themselves like crazy and it's like they egg each other on to try and go faster while I'm trying to maintain a steady walking pace. I'm not really sure how to get them to stop pulling when they're walking together. I'm sure there's something I'm doing wrong. I've been told to give them treats when they're doing things right, but one of my dogs is not remotely interested in treats when out walking so that makes it rough. Maybe I need to go back to walking them one at a time until they both get really good separately and then I can work on walking them together again. But then I worry the dog waiting behind will have an accident, which I'm obviously trying to avoid so we can keep living here. Oh well, we shall see. The upside is that my arms and shoulders are getting a great work out. The second day here my shoulders were soooo sore! Lol.

In terms of exercise these multiple daily walks have been my exercise lately. My brother and sister-in-law have a really nice treadmill down in the basement with me that I'm planning to put to use tonight for the first time. I'm also going to look for local Zumba classes. I'm bummed that I found that great place to take classes in Indianapolis only to leave without really being able to utilize it all that much.

I have to say that I'm a bit scared to see what the future holds for me. I just turned 28 and I'm basically starting over. However, I'm starting over and I still have a huge responsibility in having the 2 dogs. I'm nervous about where my life will lead me, but at the same time I'm excited to see how my life progresses over the next year or two. I'm worried I'm not going to be able to handle the dogs by myself. I'm already missing out on one thing I could have done had I not had the dogs. They're great at boarding facilities and doggy daycares, so as long as I can afford that I'll utilize those so I don't miss out on things I want to do where I can't bring them. Money is tight, though, so there's only so much I can do. Also, they're young and used to me being with them almost all the time, so leaving them home while I go out to do things always makes me a little nervous since they still chew on things from time to time when they're bored. I just try to make sure they have toys and dog bones and things to keep them busy.

Anyway, I went off on a doggy tangent again. My point was I'm a bit scared. I'm getting older and I'm single again and truth be told I really want to have kids and have a family. It gets scarier thinking about that when you're single and close to 30 and don't know where life will lead you. That said, I wouldn't change the decision that I made. I know I can build a better life for myself than the track I was on in my previous relationship. I'm hoping I find someone who inspires me to be the best me possible and pushes me to try new things and go to new places that I've always wanted to go to, but never had the guts. And I hope that I continue growing as a person to have the courage to make my life what I want it to be all on my own.

I've got a lot to figure out in the next few weeks and I'm going to try to continue eating healthy and exercising and hopefully I'll be able to weigh in this Friday, if my sister-in-law has a scale, since I didn't think to bring mine. Anyway, I'll try to post more and keep you updated on the goings on in my life.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Weigh In

This is going to be short and sweet. My weigh in change. Honestly I just haven't been tracking my food and that obviously isn't working for me. This next week I really need to track my food and utilize the classes at the place where I paid for unlimited use for the month and then I should really start to see things moving again. I did take my measurements and here they are:

Neck: 13.0 (no change)
Bicep: 12.0 (no change)
Forearm: 9.5 (-0.25)
Chest: 41.0 (-0.25)
Waist: 34.5 (-1.5)
Hips: 42.5 (-0.5)
Thigh: 23.0 (-0.25)
Calf: 14.5 (-0.25)
Total: 190.0 (-3.0)

I've lost 3 inches overall since I last took my measurements 2 months ago and 20.5 inches since I began. I'll definitely take that. Now I'm off to work my butt off today and then celebrate my birthday this weekend!!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Open House and My Birthday!!!

I have been a busy bee as of late. Monday I took my first Pilates class. I really enjoyed it! It wasn't the hardest thing I've ever done, which is a good thing, but I can definitely see how it would help lengthen your muscles and make you look long and lean. It did get me sweating a little, so it definitely wasn't exactly a piece of cake. Overall I really liked it and I look forward to returning every Monday (I bought a month unlimited pass for this place since it has the Zumba class I took on Saturday, the pilates class and it also has spinning classes which I plan to take).

Yesterday I was going to take a spinning class, but then my realtor informed me he wanted to do an open house this Sunday. I'm all for it since we've only had one person in the house so far and the house has now been on the market for a month. I'm hoping we at least get a few people in here during the open house. Anyway, since we're having the open house on Sunday I need the house to be picture perfect. I'm going out of town this weekend, leaving tomorrow evening actually, so last night and tonight were the only nights I'd have to get everything I needed to get done taken care of and Zumba's tonight, so I decided to put off spinning last night to get stuff done and then tonight I'll go to Zumba and then finish up everything else that needs to be done.

I'm really looking forward to this weekend! My 28th birthday is on Monday, so I'm leaving tomorrow evening after work and driving up to WI to stay at my best friend's house and then I'll head back Monday evening. It should definitely be a great time. My last birthday wasn't spent with any friends or anything, so I'm looking forward to really getting to celebrate with friends and just have a great time. I'll try and remember to take a few pictures so you can share in my birthday celebration with me!

I'm going to weigh in tomorrow, a day early, since I'll be driving up to WI tomorrow evening. I'm also going to do measurements since I haven't done them in forever and it's time to get on top of that. Till tomorrow...

Monday, July 26, 2010

Zumba, The Dog Park and Painting!

I had THE best weekend. Friday night I had some wine and watched movies and just hung out with my dogs. Then Saturday morning I got up and went to my first Zumba class. I absolutely LOVED it!!!! I've heard a lot about people taking Zumba classes and really enjoying it, but I just hadn't gotten myself out there to try it. First off, walking into the place that offers the class I immediately liked it. There were a bunch of women in the room waiting for the class to begin and they just seemed like a bunch of friends. I feel like a lot of these women use this class as a chance to socialize as well as get/stay fit. I'm hoping I hit it off with someone and maybe get a new friend or two out of it, but who knows. I tend to be a little shy in situations like this and just keep to myself, but if someone approaches me, then I'm an open book and am completely outgoing. Anywho, the class started and I immediately had a huge grin on my face. I'm a dancer at my core, even though it's been quite some time since I've actually danced. So when we started dancing I was immediately on cloud nine. Plus, since I love to dance I put that extra little oomph into each of the moves which helps me burn even more calories. The moves were a lot of hip hop and salsa/latin type moves, which I really enjoy so that was fun. Overall it was just great. The first half hour I was rocking it, but the second half I did have to push a bit harder. I think that's a good thing though, it just means that the class challenges me. I will definitely be back for more Zumba!

After the class I went home and showered and loaded up the dogs and took them to the dog park. It was fairly hot out, so the dog park was completely empty. Luckily my dogs have each other to play with so it wasn't a big deal. Since it's basically just a huge fenced in field we just walked around the entire park a few times and spent about half an hour there. The dogs loved it of course.

After that I took the dogs home and went out and did a little shopping. Lately I've been coming out my shell a bit more in terms of how I dress and my "style". I'm just enjoying buying things that really make me feel good about myself. I'm still on a budget, so I didn't go crazy but I got a couple things at Old Navy. Here are pics of a few of the things I got and the colors I got them in:

I also got a long black sun dress that I couldn't find a picture of and a pair of black exercise shorts. I went to Victoria's Secret too and bought some new bras. Let me tell you, that was LONG overdue. The bras I had just didn't fit well. I've known for a while that I should get a few new ones, so since it's my birthday in a week and Victoria's Secret sent me a coupon in the mail I figured what the heck and bought myself some pretty bras that actually fit! What a concept, lol.

After my little shopping spree I went home, had dinner and then I painted! Two of my hobbies checked off in one day! I painted the picture for a friend of mine, so I don't want to post a picture of it before I give it to them, but I think I did really good. More importantly, though, I enjoyed it. Painting is just soothing. That was the end of my day and I couldn't have been happier.

I woke up on Sunday feeling energized and a little sore from Zumba, but I was still just feeling really good about life. I met up with a friend and we went to this little store that opened recently near her place where everything in the store is handmade. I bought these cute earrings and couple hair pins with flowers. Then we went to the movies and afterward got some pizza at this great pizza place. It was definitely another great day.

I'm just feeling really good about life right now. I'm happy about these changes I'm seeing in myself and my attitude. Life is good. :-)

Friday, July 23, 2010

Weigh In

I weighed in this morning at 182.4 lbs. That's a 0.6 lb loss since last week. Nothing huge, but hey, it's a loss, so I'll take it. :-) I need to really focus on exercise these next two weeks or so, because I'd love love love to get down to the 170's. My low weight last time I attempted to lose weight was 176.5 lbs, so I can't wait to surpass that. I got there way faster than I am this time around, but this time I think it'll stick. So even though it's taking a while I don't think I'll end up putting the weight back on again. I just won't. Anyway, I'm hoping to get into the 170's over the next two weeks or so. That would mean I'd have to lose an average of 1.3 lbs per week. I can do this!

On another note I had some great food yesterday. In the afternoon I was feeling hungry, so I decided to have a more substantial snack. These shrimp were actually huge! I had 5 shrimp and a sweet chili sauce to dip them in. I only used half of the sauce in the picture. It was a great snack and it was only 130 calories.

Then for dinner I wanted to use up some lettuce in my fridge that was going to go bad if I didn't eat it, so I made a huge salad. I washed and chopped up the lettuce, chopped up half an orange heirloom tomato and a little red onion. Then I cooked a chicken breast on my George Foreman grill and chopped that up. Finally I topped it off with this peanut vinaigrette dressing I have. The whole thing was just 266 calories. Not too shabby!

I've really been making an effort to track my sodium and keep sodium levels down and it's much harder than I thought. I'm shooting to keep it under 2000 mg a day. That is NOT easy. The first day I had nearly 4000!!! There were a few things I ate that contributed to it being that high. The Fiber One pancake mix had 440 mg, pasta had 488 mg, some light italian dressing (that I LOVE) had 720 mg, some turkey lunch meat had 632 mg, meatless meatballs had 608g and finally a piece of naan had 390 mg. It was just crazy to me how much sodium was in some of these items. I did much better yesterday, but it's definitely something you have to be conscious of or it's so easy to go over.

I guess that's all for now. I hope you all have something fun planned this weekend!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Yummy Eats and High Blood Pressure?

I made the most amazing dinner last night. I grilled these boneless pork ribs. They were soooo good! All you need with these bad boys is a little salt free spice rub and they are good to go. On the side I made a cold pasta salad. I made some spaghetti and while it was cooking/cooling I chopped up a cucumber, a tomato, a little bit of red onion and some goat cheese. Then I mixed it all with a little light italian dressing. Yum!

I also got in some cycling last night. I did 20 miles in 81 mins. That's just under 15 mph. Nothing mind blowing, but it was a decent ride. It felt good to be active.

Finally, this morning when I woke up I just wanted a warm breakfast. I used some Fiber One pancake mix and added some frozen blueberries and made one big blueberry pancake with a little light syrup. I also had like a cup of fresh blueberries on the side.

One thing I wanted to mention is that I've been having blood pressure issues. I've gone to the doctor and it's normal and I've gone again and it's at the low end of high, so my doctor suggested over the next few weeks I test myself sporadically and then go see her with the results. So while I'm doing these random tests I'm also going to track my sodium intake and make sure I exercise daily. The last thing I want is to be told I need to go on blood pressure meds, so I need to do what it takes to get myself to where I need to be so that these high blood pressure readings no longer happen.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010


When I started this blog I said that I wanted to get back to the person that I used to be. I think I've made some major strides toward that, one hard, but necessary thing, being the break up. I feel much more like "me" than I have in a long time. However, being single again and living in Indiana in a big house all by myself leaves me with a TON of time to do whatever it is I'd like to do. I don't have to check in with anyone or make plans based on someone else's wants or needs. I can just focus on my own wants and needs. That's definitely a freeing thing.

One thing all of this free time has helped me realize is that I'm not doing anything to foster the hobbies I used to have. So many times over the past few years people would ask me what my hobbies were or what I did for fun and I felt like I never had a real answer. I would think of the things that I used to do, but it just wasn't something I made a priority in my day to day life, which is sad. I had fallen so far away from doing the things that truly make me happy and it felt impossible to get it all back.

I'm going to start to work toward changing that. I do have things that I truly enjoy doing that really make me happy. One thing that I've always held onto is reading. Every night before I go to bed I read. What I read is not this amazing literature that's going to change the world, but I read trashy romance novels and murder mysteries and I'm ok with that. It helps to just be able to lose yourself in a story and forget about all of life's problems for a period of time and that's what reading does for me. I can guarantee that for the rest of my life I will read and it will very likely be a trashy romance novel on my bedside table.

There are a few hobbies that I was a part of in the past that I'm going to work toward bringing back into my life. The first is dancing. I absolutely love dancing. Dancing is another one of those things for me where I can let go of all my inhibitions and just "be". I took dance from the time I was 5 and even taught for a few years in high school and was part of a traveling dance troupe. Then college came along and I was much busier and I took the occasional dance class, but since the arts were not my area of focus it just kind of fell to the wayside. Then it was kind of funny, because I had gained some weight and I stopped dancing because I didn't feel comfortable next to a lot of the other dancers since they were mostly fit. It was funny, because it was kind of a self fulfilling prophecy. I didn't dance because I was overweight, but if I had danced maybe I wouldn't have been overweight. Dancing is a great thing for me to get back into, because it accomplishes two goals at once. It gets me additional exercise in which will help me get to the healthy weight I want to be at and at the same time it'll make me happy because I'll be doing something that I truly love that'll just make my soul happy. Now I need to get out there and see if I can find a belly dancing class or a hip hop class or something fun like that!

One other thing I'm going to start doing more of is painting. Now, I've never taken any sort of painting classes (although I've always wanted to), so I am about as much of a novice as I could possibly be. However, I find true joy out of painting. My thought is this, I'll start painting for fun and see where that takes me. Then once I move to Milwaukee I'll see if there are any painting classes I can take to help me learn a little about this hobby I know nothing about, but enjoy.

One last hobby that I love, probably more than anything else, is singing. Now the problem here is I don't know what to do about this hobby other than singing in the shower or singing in my car (which I already do of course, lol). This is a hobby that it's not exactly easy to keep going as an adult, unless you're religious and want to sing as part of a church choir (which I'm not) or you're looking to do it on more of a professional level. I'm not sure what exactly I can do to foster this hobby, but I'll definitely put some thought into it and see if I come up with anything.

So those are some of my plans for the near future. Do you have any hobbies you let fall to the wayside that you'd love to reclaim?

I went to this great little market yesterday! Basically it's a year round indoor farmer's market, or at least that's how they refer to themselves. It's this little storefront that has tons of fresh fruits, vegetables, pies, honey, bread, cheese, etc. Everything comes from local farms and is wonderfully fresh and flavorful. It's a little bit of a drive from my house, but totally worth it. Plus they gave me this cute wooden basket to take home all of my wares. :-) I got peaches, blueberries, blackberries, goat cheese, a yellow onion, a red onion, a couple heirloom tomatoes, a regular tomato, a green zucchini, a yellow zucchini, a cucumber and some lettuce.

This morning I decided to make a yummy breakfast using the fresh blueberries I picked up last night, so mixed together oatmeal, vanilla greek yogurt, blueberries and walnuts. It was fantastic!

That's all for now. I hope you're all having a great week!

Friday, July 16, 2010

Weigh In

I've got to make this short and sweet. I weighed in this morning at 183.0. I was totally surprised I stayed the same. My clothes have been fitting so much better I thought for sure I'd have a great weigh in. But alas, it stayed the same. It will go down in due time. I'll just keep at it and I'll get there eventually. Have a great weekend!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Good News!

I had my first showing of the house today! I know that doesn't really mean anything, but I'm just happy to at least have gotten my first people through the house. Who knows, maybe I'll get lucky. Really I'm just happy to have at least gotten one showing. We'll see if anything happens from here.

Aside from that I had a pretty good day yesterday. I made good food choices and rode my bike for almost an hour and a half. I'm planning to ride again tonight and to continue tracking my points. I'm planning to really be good this week and hopefully that will result in my first decent loss in a while. Anything over a pound would make me ecstatic.

I'm in much better spirits today than I was before. The showing helped, the good food choices and exercise helped and just time in general helped. I knew it wouldn't take me too long to get over my "blues" and that's proven to be true. Also, I've got plans to drive up to WI and see friends this weekend, so that'll be great.

Anyway, I hope you're all having a great week!

Monday, July 12, 2010

This is really hard...

Yesterday and today have been really rough for me. Not food-wise or really even in terms of the relationship, just with where my life's at at this point. Yesterday Steve took three of the cats to his new place. I've been looking forward to it in some ways, because with five cats and two dogs there's just so much pet hair. Then there's litter boxes and the fact that we're trying to sell the house and I just knew everything would be easier once some of the cats were out of the house. Also, I've felt for a while now that we just had too many pets. I knew it'd be hard and I'd miss them, but it was harder than I expected. I work from home, so they are always with me. I've still got the two cats we had the longest, but it was hard nonetheless. I was the one that put them in the carriers. With each one I started crying a little more. When he left and I just had to let go and let myself cry it out a bit. I know it'll be alright, but right now it's tough.

Then on top of that I just don't feel like I have a lot of support down here. I have friends, don't get me wrong, but they are mutual friends and I feel like there are certain things they just don't want to hear or don't want me to talk about so I can't fully open up. Now is a time when I need to be around people I can just let it all out with and I just don't feel I have that. I have other friends that I can be completely open with, but one is in CA and another is in WI. I have others that are supportive, but really two people have been there for me the most throughout this and they're just not close by so it's hard.

In a few days I'll probably be feeling better. I think it's just the cats being taken and me being down here alone this past weekend that's made it more difficult. I'm hoping to go up to WI again this weekend and stay with friends. This too shall pass...right?

Friday, July 9, 2010

Weigh In!!

Hey guys! Sorry I haven't posted for over a week. Things have been extremely hectic for me. I've been doing lots of projects around the house to get it in tip top shape, helping Steve move stuff over to his new place, cleaning, packing some of my own stuff, etc. On top of that I went out of town this past weekend, so it's just been crazy. The past two days have been especially crazy. We had a photographer coming to take pictures yesterday, so we had to get everything picture perfect. That meant finishing off all of those little projects (touching up paint, etc.) and then putting away EVERYTHING. We stayed up till after midnight Wed night finishing everything and putting everything away. Then yesterday we had our cleaning lady and her daughter come over to get every last hair, so that the house looked spic and span in the pictures. And then when they were thisclose to being done the photographer showed up, so there was this overlap of trying to get them out so he could get was just crazy. After he was done we were starving and treated ourselves to a burrito.

This morning when I weighed in I thought for sure I'd see something in the upper 180's. I have been doing a lot around the house, but I haven't really been watching what I eat all that much. In fact, while I was out of town I had a lot of liquid calories. Although, I've been doing a lot of green smoothies for breakfast so at least I was staying nutritious there and was trying not to overeat even if I wasn't eating the best thing. Let me just cut to the chase. I weighed in this morning at 183.0 lbs. Nothing mind blowing, but hey that's a decrease and with everything going on I'll take it!

I want to get into better eating habits, so when Steve officially moves out this weekend I'm going to overhaul my diet a bit and just start planning better. I have to transition from shopping for two to shopping for one, so I think if I have a planned menu it'll help me not overbuy. I have a tendency to buy more than needed for two, so imagine what that would mean if I'm only buying for me! Anyway, I want to fix these bad habits so I'm going to come up with a plan and stick to it.

Tomorrow I'll definitely be getting in a ton of exercise since I'll be helping Steve move all of his stuff to his new place and I believe it'll just be the two of us. After that I can really start to focus on me and I'm looking forward to that. :-)

Thursday, July 1, 2010


Good morning everyone! I had the most amazing breakfast this morning and it was inspired by another blogger. Caitlin over at Healthy Tipping Point has a really great blog. It's a must read for anyone trying to live a healthier life. I feel like her life is literally what we'd all aspire to have. She makes herself and her husband amazing meals and it's always consisting of fresh whole foods. On top of that she's a runner and a cyclist and seems to be exercising non-stop! Her lifestyle is definitely what I aspire to. Who knows, maybe some day I'll get there. I'm working on it.

Anyway, the reason I brought her up is because of my breakfast! She makes these things she calls oatmeal messes or yogurt messes or something like that. Basically she takes raw oatmeal, greek yogurt and then tosses in whatever else she feels like having that morning. The oatmeal doesn't get cooked, you just eat it raw and you mix it all together. Here's my first attempt at an oatmeal mess:

It contains:
1/2 cup raw oatmeal
1 container Dannon Vanilla Greek Yogurt
1 banana (123g)
5 strawberries (88g)
slivered almonds (7g)

Nutrition info: 438 calories, 6.7g Fat, 9.75g Fiber

It was phenomenal! I really loved it. This definitely won't be the last time I enjoy this for breakfast. Other breakfasts I've tried of hers are a Grilled Banana Sandwich and Green Monster Smoothies (made with 2 cups spinach, 1 cup soy milk - she uses rice milk, 1 banana, 15 frozen cherries and 1/2 cup oatmeal if you want to give it some more substance or not if you just want a pick me up). None of her breakfasts so far have disappointed. They've all been very flavorful and filling. You can't beat that. I'm going to have to try some of her other recipes for sure. Now I just need to get as active as she is!

I'm leaving tonight to drive up to WI for the holiday weekend. I'm very excited! A little time with my best friend is just what the doctor ordered. I hope you all have a great 4th of July!

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Back on the horse

I exercised today!! Finally! It's been like 3 weeks since I've exercised, so it was a long time coming. I rode on my stationary bike for an hour and did 15 miles. Nothing mind blowing, but it felt good. Also, I did the majority of it at a higher resistance level than I ever have before. I actually did the ride on my lunch break and I don't know why I don't do that more often! I've always thought about doing it and just never have. I mean, I work from home for god's sake. You can't get a much better gig in terms of wanting to work out on your lunch break, since afterward I can shower and then I don't have to worry about hair or makeup or anything. Anyway, here's me after my ride.

Tonight after work we are going to Home Depot to get a few items to fix up the last of our little projects around the house. Then we'll get the house cleaned and have the photographer come take pictures. That'll get me that much closer to selling the house a moving forward with my life. I'm going to Milwaukee this weekend to spend the 4th with my best friend. What are you all doing for the 4th of July?

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Such Is Life

Life has definitely been crazy lately. I hate the unknown. I hate not knowing where I'm going to be living once (if) the house sells. I hate not knowing how I'm going to manage taking care of the dogs on my own. I hate not knowing how long it's going to take me to meet the right person and start the family I long to have. At the same time I can't wait to see what my new place will look like. I can't wait to develop new, healthy habits where I walk my dogs regularly instead of just allowing them to play in the yard. I can't wait to meet the right person that's going to make my life what I know it can be and to start a family and be the amazing mom I know I'm capable of being.

This breakup has been huge for me as a human being. I've become unbelievably confident in who I am as a person. I've learned so many things about myself that will not only benefit my future relationships, but will benefit me in my future life. I've always thought of myself as a strong confident woman, but now that strength has improved tenfold. I'm just very optimistic about what it is I have to offer the world and what the world has to offer me.

This is silly, but sometimes I watch The Dog Whisperer and Cesar Millan says that you don't choose dogs based on what you want out of a dog, but dogs choose you based on what you need or something like that. Anyway, I have to agree with this. I love my dogs to death but they are athletic dogs that need lots of activity. And I'm someone that can lack motivation to work out. My dogs will need regular walks once we're in Milwaukee since I doubt I'll have a fenced in yard where I can just open the door and let them run out and play with one another. This will get me out there getting regular exercise whether I like it or not and I'm grateful for that since I need that extra push. Especially since I'll be living somewhere I've never lived before, so it'll get me out there exploring.

The only issue is my dogs absolutely suck walking on leashes. I know the main reason is because they don't do it regularly, but they just choke the heck out of themselves and it is sooo frustrating. I've tried so many different things. I've tried harnesses that would tighten under their arms when they pulled. They seemed to help for a little while, but it never fully resolved the pulling issue. That also kept them from choking themselves, which I of course liked, but now they've grown out of them. Then I tried just plain old walking them with a collar on a leash and shortening the leash to try and make them walk by my side, but they'd still just pull non-stop and choke themselves. Then someone suggested I try a gentle leader which is a collar that also wraps around their nose and then the leash is connected under their snout, so if they try and pull it pulls their head to the side and then they can't go where it is they want to go since they're constantly getting pulled to the side so the theory is that they learn to stop pulling so they can go where they want to go without their head getting pulled to the side. Duke would just roll on the grass to try and get the thing off and poor Dot made herself bleed trying to get that thing off.

Also, to put it into perspective I took the two dogs, by myself, to the groomers to get their nails clipped. They aren't huge dogs, ones in the upper 40's and the other is in the mid 50's, however they are extremely strong! Even at the intermediate training class at PetSmart the trainer commented on how deceiving Dot's size was given how strong she was (she's the smaller of the two too). Anyway, the two dogs basically pulled me all the way from my car into the groomers in the back of a PetSmart. First off it was tiring trying to control them, second off it was embarrassing.

To try and solve this issue once and for all I'm going to have a dog trainer come to my house and teach me how to walk my dogs. It sounds silly, but I obviously need help. In a few months (maybe less than that if I'm lucky) I'll be moving to Milwaukee and I would love to be able to walk my dogs together. It'd be much more fun to explore if I didn't have to worry about leaving one of them at home and then I'd have to go back switch dogs and take the other one out for a walk. If I want to take the dogs to a groomer or the vet I'd like to be able to take them both at once rather than having to make separate appointments just so I can manage one dog at a time. Overall, I'm just looking forward to the training sessions to cover the few issues they have and just help me to learn how to be a great pet owner and fully turn them into the great dogs I know they can be. They have such a great temperament and are very loving, so if I could just get this major issue and a few others under control, then I know I will have no issues taking care of them on my own.

Regarding my house, I have officially put it on the market. The realtor came by yesterday and I signed all of the necessary paperwork. Now we just need to fix some minor things around the house, have our cleaning lady come and do a good deep clean and stage all of the rooms and then have my agent's photographer come and take pictures. After that we'll start to move out some of the bigger furniture items that Steve's taking with him to his new place. Then he'll take the cats with him as well (and I'll have the cleaning lady come again to take care of any cat hair issues and do another good clean), so that when people want to look at the house there won't be cats or cat boxes in the house to deter them from making an offer and I'll just have the dogs and dog hair to worry about so it won't be too bad. Then once the house sells I'll take two of the cats off his hands and move me, the dogs and the two cats up to Milwaukee.

In the meantime I need to work exercise back into my routine. With all of the craziness I have allowed myself to completely stop exercising. I've done a fair amount of cleaning and packing, but not enough to make up for the regular exercise I need to be getting. I'll get it all figured out. I hope you are all having a great week!

Friday, June 25, 2010

Oh Air Conditioning How I Loathe The

The air conditioning unit is busted. I don't know what's wrong with it yet, but we had to shut it off cause it was continuing to leak and obviously we can't have that. We did soak up all the water and the ceiling has had a chance to dry off and it looks fine luckily. Today I'm looking at a high temp of 85...tomorrow 92. Thank god I was able to get an appointment with someone to come by tomorrow to check it out. What time they'll be coming tomorrow? That's another story, I have no idea. But hey, I'll take what I can get. Sleeping without air conditioning last night was just dandy, but what can you do. I just hope to god they can fix the dang thing tomorrow.

Aside from that I weighed in this change from two weeks ago. Oh well, at least it's not up. I was expecting it to go down, though. I tracked my points all week. We'll see what happens next week. Plus I have to start packing and cleaning, so I'll be burning calories just doing that.

I made a massage appointment for Monday and let me tell you, I REALLY need it. My lower back has been killing me all week. I don't know if it's just stress or what, but I'm looking forward to getting a little relief. I was hoping to get lucky and get in sooner, but I'll take it.

I need to work on getting some exercise in at some point this next week, but we shall see what I can do considering everything that needs to get done. I'll definitely have a busy weekend and week ahead of me. Hopefully the meeting with the realtor on Monday will bring some guidance in terms of what my next move is. I hope you all have a great weekend!

Thursday, June 24, 2010


The realtor is supposed to be coming tomorrow to do a walk through so we can hopefully put the house on the market, but what do we discover today...the air conditioning unit on the second floor is leaking and water is dripping down into the kitchen on the first floor. Of course it is, of course this would happen right now!! Talk about bad timing. Needless to say all of a sudden I'm stressed out! We're changing the walk through to Monday and we're going to try and figure this whole air conditioning thing out. This is just the last thing I need to deal with. Especially considering it's a million degrees outside and now we can't use the air conditioning. Go figure. My gut instinct is to go out and get some crappy food to bury the stress, but instead I'll go downstairs and make myself a healthy lunch. Just pray that we figure this out and that it doesn't cause any problems and doesn't put a hitch in this whole process. Ugh.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

I'm Back

Sorry I've been MIA for a while. I've just been dealing with everything that comes along with a breakup. Things are going quite well considering. I went up to WI last weekend to spend time with friends and just let loose a little. My brother and his wife ended up joining us Saturday night and it was really great seeing them. It just helps to be around people that are so close to you. It puts things into perspective. There's a lot to figure out, but so far so good. Here's a pic of me and my brother from Saturday night. :-)

I have to sell my house (it's in my name only) or rent it out, so I'm waiting to hear back from my realtor to see which path I should go. I really believe renting it out could be a great move, however, then I'd have to hire a property management company since I'd be out of state. If I could sell it that would help to have some closure, though. I have to find a place of my own now as well. I'm planning to move to Milwaukee. It's going to be great to be closer to friends and family. However, I'm going to have both dogs and two of the cats (Steve's taking the other three cats), so I've got to find a rental that will accept me with that many pets. I'm a great tenant and my pets are well behaved, so keep your fingers crossed for me. I've already found a few places on craigslist that would definitely be a possibility if I were ready to move now so it looks promising.

Other than all of the moving and house stuff I'm still counting points. I didn't really last week, however, for part of the week I didn't really have an appetite. Then this past week I just wanted to enjoy everyone's company and just relax. Now I'm back in the grind though. Getting to a healthy weight is still extremely important to me, even with everything going on in my life right now so it will continue to be a priority in my decision making. I'm hoping to move to a neighborhood where it's very easy to walk or bike to coffee shops or the grocery store or wherever. It'll be nice to be less reliant on my car...especially since it's got 187,000 miles on it. Gotta love Hondas. Anyway, things are moving along and I'm looking forward to seeing what the future holds for me.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Bad News

I have some bad news, well it was the right thing to do, but still hard nonetheless. I broke things off with my fiance. We'd been together nearly five years, so this is unbelievably hard. I'm trying to stay strong, but wow this is more than I ever expected. I know I did the right thing though. The funny thing is whenever I heard people talk about losing their appetite after a breakup I thought it was a joke. It's so not a joke. I guess when there's so much going on in your head food is just the last thing you care to think about. Anyway, things are rough with more hard times to come in the near future, but that's what's going on with me right now and I just wanted to let you know.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Weigh In and Wedding!

I weighed in this morning.  It's a day earlier than usual as I said it would be since we had to drive up to Wisconsin for my friend's wedding.  Let's get to the weigh in, though.  One less day than usual and I weighed in at 183.6 lbs!!  I've lost 3 pounds since last week!  Steve and I were really diligent about tracking points.  There isn't one day that went by where I didn't track my food and obviously it paid off.  I really wanted to make up for my bad week last week and I'm proud to say that I did.  

I have only 2.6 lbs to go until I reach 25 lbs lost!  I know my weight loss has been very slow going coming to an average of less than a pound a week and I'm sure it'd be more interesting to read about if it was coming off faster, but the fact is that this isn't easy for me.  I struggle with motivating myself to exercise regularly and to cook and make healthy choices.  But the fact is I'm making progress.  Things are moving in the right direction.  I may stumble and have set backs, but I keep getting myself back on track.  The fact that I've been doing this for a little over 6 months now and haven't given up is great.  Yes, I wish I were farther along, but I'm doing my best and I'm sticking with it.  3.8 lbs to go and my BMI will be in the 26's!  I'm getting there slowly but surely.

My friend's wedding is this Saturday.  We checked into our hotel tonight and are very pleased with the accommodations.  It's going to be a nice little getaway for us.  For once we don't have any pets to worry about, just ourselves.  However, this is the first time we've left the puppies with someone else and it is very weird.  I was definitely more sad than I expected to be when we dropped them off at the boarding facility/doggy daycare.  I know they'll take good care of them and that they'll have a blast, but what can I say they are my babies.  The good news is that the place has a Facebook page and takes videos of the doggies playing and posts them.  So even though we don't have them with us we can virtually check up on them.  :-)

Now about that wedding.  I've mentioned before that we had issues with the bridesmaid dresses coming in late.  We didn't get them until the end of May (2 months late).  I took the dress straight to the seamstress as soon as I got it.  It needed to be let out a little around the rib cage and brought in a teeny bit at the top to keep my bust from toppling out and they also needed to add a lace modesty panel.  Well, first off we got our wires crossed on when I needed the dress.  I told her the absolute last date I could pick it up was the 10th (today), so that's what she wrote on her ticket.  Then we brought in a suit for Steve a couple days later.  She had his suit done in a matter of days.  When we picked up his suit I inquired about my dress.  She mentioned the date it was supposed to be done was the 10th and I re-explained that was the last date I could pick it up, but if I could get it sooner that would be better.  This was last Saturday and they were closed Sunday and Monday, so she said she'd have it done for me on Tuesday.  I show up on Tuesday and she had forgot she pushed the date forward, so she asked me to come back the next day.  I came back the next day and the dress felt tighter than it had when I dropped it off!  She's nothing but nice, so I wasn't mad just a little stressed considering the time constraint issue.  She said they'd fix it and I could come back around 6pm the time they close.  I get there at 10 to 6 and they were just finishing up the dress.  I try it on and it's still tight, but she tells me they let it out as much as they could.  I'm nervous about it being tight, but what can I do.  I pay for the dress and leave.  Now, let me tell you, since I got the dress back it has stressed me out to no end!  I just don't want it to end up tearing or something during the wedding.  I can deal with being uncomfortable I just don't want it to be a problem.  If she would have worked on the dress earlier we may have been able to come up with a solution to add just a teeny bit of fabric to make it fit, it's thisclose to fitting.  But since it wasn't done till the last minute we didn't have time.  Let's just hope the dress makes it through the day...

Monday, June 7, 2010

What a Weekend!

Hey everyone! I hope you had a great weekend! I definitely did. It was busy, but fun. My friend's getting married next weekend, so there's last minute wedding stuff that we're trying to take care of. My dress was dropped off at the seamstresses the day after I finally got it (after it arriving 2 months late). It's been a week and a half and she said it should be ready tomorrow. It's a little stressful having to wait until the last minute, but it practically fit the way it was so I'm sure it'll be fine. If not, I'm confident she's the kind of seamstress who would immediately fix it. She knows that the wedding's out of town and the date we're leaving (Thurs morning), so it should be fine.

Steve also had to get a suit tailored. I'm not sure if I mentioned it or not, but we found a suit for him at a thrift store for $19! Then we spent $40 for the seamstress to fix a few things. There were some slight issues with the coat. It fit fine, but we just wanted her to clean up the lining where it was coming undone in some places and the seam in one area. Really just small fixes with the coat. The pants had to be let out a little in the waist, hemmed a wee bit and finally just altered them to make them more of a slim leg versus it being kind of boot cut when we got it. The suit also included a vest, so she had to let that out as much as she could, but there wasn't much fabric for her to work with so it's still just a touch too small so Steve won't be wearing it. All in all the suit looks amazing! She said that if he would have bought that suit new it would have been $450-$500!! Yeah, I'd say we got a pretty good deal. We're planning to do the same thing for his wedding suit. He'll probably get a new shirt and tie (although he's literally got hundreds of ties, so maybe he won't get a new tie - he collects them). It'll be fine trying to find another awesome suit out there on the cheap. :-)

Other than that we just had a few other errands to run. We had to get the dogs a new dog bed, since we're boarding them while we're away for the weekend and the ones we had were starting to get kind of grungy. I had to find a place that I'd be able to get my nails done at before we leave for the wedding. We had to find a dry cleaner to take Steve's suit to after we had picked it up from the seamstress. Just a lot of busy work running around. That's what happens when you move to a new state, you have to find all new places.

Other than that it's just life as usual. We're counting points and exercising (we're going to ride 25 miles tonight and tomorrow if weather permits), so we should definitely see a loss this week. Last week we just made a lot of bad decisions. It's funny how you can let a holiday put you in this mind frame where you keep making excuses and making bad choices beyond the holiday. That's life I guess. We're all learning here and there will be times where we'll make good choices and times where we'll make bad ones and for me that was a time for bad ones.

I'll leave you with a few pet related things. If you're not a pet lover feel free to skip this last part. :-) We got this great water bowl stand. It was made by a guy that works at the daycare/boarding facility we'll be keeping our dogs at while we're gone. Apparently he used to be in construction, so he's got woodworking experience. It was $30, but well worth it. It was unfinished when we first looked at it and he cut it a little shorter so it would be the right height for our dogs and he also stained it this color which matches our kitchen cabinets. Honestly, it was a great buy. Basically every time I filled the puppies water dish they'd decide to play in it and there'd be water everywhere. This is no longer a problem.

This is a picture of our cat Toby. He absolutely loves sleeping/hanging out next to our patio door. Then every time we put the dogs out he tries to sneak outside with them. He can be a pain, but he's cute as all get out so what can you do.

Then there's Boo boo our angry old man. I was wearing this sweater and he just kept kneading me and poking me with his claws and thoroughly driving me nuts. Then I was warm, so I took off the sweater and he just passed out on top of it. It was quite cute. He may be a bit bipolar, but when he's like this he's just a great cat.

Well those are all of my pet hi-jinks for today. I hope you're all having a great week.